Who's next?
We've been crunching the numbers...
Some people say this a waste of talent, and a waste of computing resources. Maybe.
Others have said this proves we lack class, or even basic decency. Very possible.
Regardless, our research shows almost everybody just wants to know one thing:
Which notable people are most likely to die next??
How could anyone answer this question? Impossible isn't it? Only baby jesus could know such things right???
Prepare to have your mind blown. Introducing:
The Deathpulse Reaper-Quant Team ™
Brilliant. Dark. Human-computer machines.
We write algorithms only the darkest and most depraved computers can interpret, and execute.
Nerds. We barely pay them anything, but they live for this death stuff. So what's the harm? We all get to "reap" (hahaha) the benefits!
The Deathpulse.com Next-2-Die™ predictions are:
Drum roll, please...
Emma Watson
English actress and activist (born 1990).
Born April 15th, 1990 in Le Marais.
Going-2-Die™ September 18th, 2025 at 35 years old
Joo Sae-hyuk
South korean table tennis player.
Born January 20th, 1980 in Seoul.
Going-2-Die™ September 17th, 2025 at 45 years old
Ida Vitale
Uruguayan writer.
Born November 2nd, 1923 in Montevideo. [ref]
Going-2-Die™ September 15th, 2025 at 101 years old
Vanja Blomberg
Swedish artistic gymnast.
Born January 28th, 1929 in Gothenburg.
Going-2-Die™ September 16th, 2025 at 96 years old
Spooky right?? Well...if any of these predictions come true it would be.
C'mon, you'd be impressed. You'd tell a friend. Maybe click on an advertisement or two?
And if they don't come true?
Suppose that's good news, cause these fine people will live to reap (hahaha) another day!
Prediction run #1757964007
Algorithm v0.2
Quant employee ID 348
We'll keep improving our predictions, but you can share these exact results using:
https://www.deathpulse.com/next?key=eyJydW4iOjE3NTc5NjQwMDcsImlkcyI6WzQzODExNSw0Mzg1NzUsNDMwOTE2%0ALDU1Mzg0MSwxMzEzOTldfQ%3D%3D%0A
Ya'll come on back any time for more Deathpulse.com Next-2-Die™ predictions!
Death is the ultimate boundary of human matters. Horace